SMS Jokes - Part 3

Terror English :-
1) There is no wind in d football..
2) I talk, he talk, y u middle talk??
3) U rotate d ground 4 times..
4) U go n understand d tree..
5) I'll give u clap..
6) Bring ur parents with ur mother n father..
7)Y Haircut not cut??

"Kanner varumpothu ithayam valithal athu Natpu,
ithayam valikum pothu kaneer vanthal athukathal illai.
nenjuvali.
so doctora pooi parunga".:-)

A person read in the newspaper:
"Micrsoft buys Skype for 8.5bilion"
He shook his head &said:
Idiots, they could hav downloaded it 4 free! :-P;)

Mother problema?
"M.Kumaran. S/O mahalakshmi" paru.
Father problema?
"santhosh subramaniam" paru.
Sister problema?
"pasamalar" paru.
Brother problema?
"vaanathaipola" paru.
Lover brother problema?
"Run" paru.
Loverae problema?
" Ava thangachiya" paru....

Penkaluku
Pirandha veedu,
Puguntha
Veedunu 2 Veedu
Irukum Pothu,
Angalukku
Sinna Veedu,
Periya Veedu
Iruka Kudatha.?
- Oru Appaviyin Kural..

Shajahan
Mumtaj ninaiva
Tajmahal
Kattinaan...!
Mada payan.!
Konjam yosichu irundha mumtaj ninaiva ava Thangachiya Katti irukkalaam...!
Justmiss... ;-(
he he he! :-D

Worker: Enna sir Sambalam ketaa "palaapalam" tharinga?
Manager: Adhan appave sonnom la sambalam "solaya" tharuvomnu....?

A software company interview.
Manager: Unakku M.S.Office theriyuma?
Person: Neenga address kodutha poittu varuven sir"
Manager: appudiye poiru.. varatha..;-)

A kid shouted in a bank:
Has anyone lost a bundle of currency notes tied with a red rubber band?
Many hands were raised...
Kid: Here is that rubber band.:-P

ANNIYAN : BUS la eppavumea ticket edukama poriye idhu thapunu unaku theriyadha..? Man: Mudiya vilakitu paruda moodhevi.., naan CONDUCTOR...!..

student's Smart Answers:
Q. In which battle Tipu Sultan died?
A. His last battle
Q. How would you stop Acid Indigestion?
A. Stop drinking Acid
Q. Where was the declaration of Independence signed?
A. At the bottom of the page.
Q. What is the main reason for Divorce?
A. Marriage..

Person 1 : 'I Am Going to Sleep' na enna da meaning ?
Man : Nan thoonga poren.
Person 1 : Hey pls da answer sollitu thoonga poa da,
pls pls pls..sweet dreams:-)

Woman drives home frm work on highway. Her husband cals her n says "Be careful. Its on radio tht someone is driving d wrong way on highway."
"Someone?" She replies, "There are freaking hundreds of them!":-D

Sevapana ponu than venumnu solra boys kum
settleaana payan than venumnu solra gals kumore 1u kelvi than
.
.
.
"BETRAMOX LIGHT'E DHAN VENUMA YEN INDHA THEE PANDHAM LA VENAMA":-P

The society has only 1 question to ask me every time.
that is.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
"Aparam Thambi Neenga Enna Than Panreenga.?!"
*Beware of 'MANGOOSE MANDAYANS':-P

Rich man: Aaj mere pas 14 cars, 18 bikes, 4 bunglow, 3 farmhouse hai, TUMARE ps kya hai,
POOR man- Mere pas Beta hai,
.
.
.
.
Jiski GF
teri beti Hai:p;-)

Doctor: Unga wife palla pidungga 100 roobaa aagum.
Husband: Appadiya! 1000 roobaa thaaraen appadiyae naakkaiyum pudinggidungga.
doctor:....???

Hus:Breakfast Readya Time Aguthu Illana Nan Hotel ku Poren
Wife:Just 5Mts
Hus:5Mts'la Ready Ayiduma?
Wife:Illa Nan Ready Aiduren 2Perum Hotelku pogalam...!!.

Dr 1: Namma hospital vilambarathuku oru nalla punch dialogue sollunga?
Dr 2: "koottitu vanga., Thookittu ponga"

BEGGER :- Iyya saptu 7 naal aachunga...,,
SANTHANAM:- yaempa pasikalaya...????
Begger : ????

Patient: Doctor, A.C off pannunga, romba kuluruthu.
Doctor: Operation theatreke ipdi sonna, Mortuary la epdi irukka poringalo...

A boy romanticaly said 2 his gf.. "I can see d whole world in ur eyes!"
A passerby asks him: "mount road la traffic iruka nu pathu sollungalen?";-)

One guy suddenly got up in a plane nd said 'Hijack'..
Everybody put their hands up then suddenly..
Another guy frm other side got up and said 'HiJohn'..
Both friends hugged each other..
Moral: Nalla kelapuranga pa beedhiya....

Rogger Federer: I've each n evry knwldge abt tennis U can ask me anythin..
Santhanam: avalo periya apatakara ne,ok tell me, hw many holes r der in NET..??

After an accident,
A v.angry driver: I showed u d headlights
& told u 2 go by side.
Santa: I also started d wipers
& said No, no..No no. :D

Smartest thing Sardar ever did!
He changed his password to 'incorrect'
So whenever he 4gets,d computer wil remind him,
ur paswrd is 'incorrect'

Generation gap: Son-dad,if u see 100rs note and 500rs note on d floor,which will u take?
Dad-500 of course!
Son-thats so stupid!why cant u tak both?:-p

Wife takes her very sick husband to doctor.
Doc says to wife: Give him healthy breakfast daily, be pleasant ... Cook tasty dinner & don't discuss ur problems with him. Stop watching tv shows & Dont demand new jewels. If u can do this for one year ur husband will be ok.
On the way to home, husband asks wife: What did doctor say..?
Wife: polaikiradhu kastamnu sollitaar. :-

Son:Appa namma veetla kaka kathuna relation varuvangala?
Father:yes
Son:Appadina yeppo thirumbi povanga?
Father:unga amma kathuna poiduvanga.!

Girl: Appa..... Avan enna sight adikiran pa.
DAD:appadiya!
Nan avan thalaya seevittu varen
Girl:Venampa avan thala Seevamalaye AZHAGA irupaan..

Cool Fundamentals of Life:1) Money is not everything.There's mastercard & Visa.2) One should love animals.They are tasty too.3)Save water.Drink beer4) studying is healthy.So leave it for the sick.5) books are holy.So dont touch them.6)dnt shout in class n disturb those who r asleep7)love ur neighbour.Bt dont gt caught8)Every 1 should marry b'coz happiness is not the only thing in life;-)

Income Tax Officer::-( Unga Office'la Yaar Yaar Lanjam Vaanguraanga...?:-(
Staff: Sonna, Evvalavu Tharuvinga ...??B-)